"You shoot me down but I won't fall..."

This weekend was much less challenging than I thought it would be. For the most part, there was no contact.

I realized that something I said in my previous post was untrue. I said that I had not discussed the situation at fair publicly. That is incorrect. While I have not given the person's name and I have tried  to avoid giving identifying details, I recognize that people know who I am talking about.

I also want to talk about it, somewhere. So, I'll admit, I am talking smack in public.

I wish I were able to be more objective and I know that the best thing that I could do is to just shut up and let this all go. However, I am just not that big of a person. The compromise was walked back. I am not clear on the exact details. The reality seemed to be that he could through my usual environment but he wasn't allowed to stay there for a period of time. Each time he came into the environment, it felt like it was to tweak my nose. I tried to ignore it.

I tried to discuss it with a person who is very familiar with the situation. While we did discuss it to a certain degree, I felt like much of the conversation was about was how my situation was impacting other people and inconveniencing them.

I tried not to bring it up during the weekend. I figure that people are sick of hearing about it. My friends are very supportive and made me feel very welcome and loved. I didn't want to repay their kindness with bitterness and negativity.

I went to fair both days. I had a good time, but I was drained by the end of it. I kept my energy up (to a certain degree). I played, I went through the motions and I did have fun. However, being there was emotional work and I was feeling pretty drained by the end of the weekend.

I am glad to see the stuff with regards to my mother's assault case resolved, but it was also emotional labor. I spent time with my uncle, and while I love him dearly, it was also a lot of work. I was exhausted when I finally came home. So, of course, I was put through another emotional obstacle course, because that is how life seems to go at times.

I need to sleep. I need to relax. I have work tomorrow. Instead I am emotionally exhausted, frustrated and I have no idea what I am doing with my students tomorrow.