"This may mean You'll have to be a stronger man..."

There was a post a while ago on Cracked about media tropes that only apply to women. My favorite had to be the picture of Leia comforting Luke. She had just lost her whole world, he had lost his family and seen his mentor die, so of course, she is comforting him.

I hate the idea that women are supposed to care about a man's* feelings, but it's all right for a man to be an asshole about a woman's.

My husband did this to me a while ago. I had just had a hell week at work, I was sick, and it was Mother's Day. My husband told me that he just wanted a day off. He didn't even think who he was talking to or what my week had been like, just thought about what he wanted.

When my children were young, I used to try and get out one night a week to go dancing. I'd make sure that the kids were fed or that dinner was an easy thing to make. I would usually wait until the kids were in bed or nearly there. I tried to be supportive as possible. I got so much crap from my ex for all the work he would have to do, that going out became a horrible chore and I stopped going.

When he'd go out, he would call me from the office and let me know he wouldn't be coming home until late. There was no warning, and no prep on his part.

However my favorite are the men who thinks that his problems, his issues, his concerns are more important than mine. I swear if one more person tells me that he needs time to process, consider, or that I need to just be patient, I will scream. Hey buddy, I have emotions too and it would be nice if you could consider them, you know, just one bloody time! (I am sure that I am totally wrong and that my feelings have been considered on many occasions. I am being, dare we say, hysterical?)

But no, when men have emotions its a big deal and it has to be fixed right now. If it can't be fixed, you have to leave them to process at their own speed and work things out. When a woman has emotions, she's either hormonal, or she should go talk to her friends. God forbid she ask a man to put his feelings aside and deal with her, even when he caused the problems.

I decided something today. No more pretending. No more sympathy. I am so done.

I have feelings, they will be addressed or you can go fuck yourself. I am pretty damn sure I have already dealt with your feelings by now.  Even if I haven't, it won't hurt you to wait for a bit. My tea and sympathy train is derailed!

Today's song was obvious.

*I am sorry to be gender specific. I am sure all people of any gender expression can be selfish assholes. However, my problems have been with men and so I am going to be a man-hating psycho for the moment, thank you very much.