"You better watch what you do to me,,,"

I started this blog as a way to work on therapy things. I have always had a propensity to write...a lot. I find that writing, whether it be careful analysis about what I am thinking or ranting about the things that are bothering me, is essential for my mental processing.

At the moment, writing isn't working. I feel like too many people are playing games and not interacting with me honestly. In some cases I feel like a pawn in games played by other people, powerless and unaware of what my role is. In other instances, I feel like I am playing the game, but I don't know the rules, I don't know the objective and my opponent isn't interested in playing fair, just in making sure that I lose and humiliate myself in the process.

I could write more, but what is there for me to say? This isn't about social anxiety or depression. This is just being sick of having no agency. I am frustrated. I am tired of this. I feel like the only option is to stop playing.

I am about ready to just drop out from this shit entirely. I hear Tahiti is a magical place (video link).

Since Tom Petty passed recently, I will use one of his songs. Why not?