The lesson from this weekend: No one else will value my time for me, although people may show that they value me personally.
I need a name for the new guy in my life, umm Hans. Hans and I have been on a few dates. I told him about how I screwed up my weekend by essentially doing a catering gig for free. His response was to offer to help. On Saturday, he drove from an hour away to come and help me in the kitchen from 11:30 to 4:30; his only compensation being the pleasure of my company. He offered to help on Sunday, but I declined. I needed the help, I just didn't feel comfortable asking him to give up a second day because I was stupid.
Two other people (who weren't attending the event) agreed to help me. My other Saturday help showed up over an hour late. I ended up doing a lot of the preparation by myself and it is only thanks to the wonderful work that Hans did that I had dinner out on time. Due to the hard slog, I was in no shape to dance afterward, so I skipped the proffered reward for all my work. My Saturday friend did help and got me ready for Sunday Brunch, so I don't mean to say that they weren't helpful, but I learned that offering to help isn't enough. Offering the help when it is needed is important too.
My other helper (my husband) missed his promised window. We renegotiated and he agreed to show up by 2:30. He showed up nearly an hour late and that was because I called him and asked him to please show up. That said, he made up for it last night, since he took on puppy duty so I could sleep.
I am not great at asking for help, as I mentioned before. I need to remember who was willing to help me. I need to learn how to prioritize my time with them accordingly. I also need to get better about asking for help and specifying my expectations instead of just being grateful that they offered to help at all.
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