"Once I rose above the noise and confusion..."

This past weekend was a genuinely good one. I enjoyed much needed social interaction with a number of my friends. I would say it is the best weekend I have had in a long while. In some ways, I felt like I had returned from a long trip or recovered from an illness. I don't think I had realized how many people had been worried about me.

I wish I could say I didn't know how it happened, but it is one of those flaws I have to work on. I get so wrapped up with a romantic partner, that I forget to take care of my own social needs. I am one of those people who puts their own life on hold and devotes most of my resources and energies to my partner. I allowed it to get to the point where I was being sucked dry and getting little to nothing in return. I neglected my friends. Thankfully, they are wonderful people who have been nothing but supportive and understanding.

The overall message I received this past weekend was that people have been very worried about me and how much of myself I had lost. The other message is that I seemed happier than people had seen in a long time. It's true, I am much happier and feeling much more able to take on the challenges of the new school year and my extra-curricular activities.

It was good to be social. I forget how much I like the banter, looking into dreamy eyes while dancing, and sitting down for a good gossip with my friends and catching up on their lives. I am an extrovert, at least when I am living healthily. I left all of my social activities feeling far more energized and relaxed. I am sure some of it is that I have medications settled and I am not in chronic pain, but I feel that there are some other recent changes that are also responsible for my positive feelings.

This is a good thing, because without me realizing it, I have filled this month with activities and obligations. I will have to make and effort to put time aside for myself. I am finding that I have been far more productive at work (so far), so hopefully I can keep on top of my classes and the increased work load.

I am teaching three Advanced Placement Psychology classes, so I am prepping 98 students for the test at the end of the year. I am so relieved that another person in the department stepped up to be chair because I would have been overwhelmed if I had to take on that responsibility. I had not factored in that I will need to prep to teach my workshops at the end of October and early November.

Today's song is a bit over dramatic, however it rang true as I was driving home last night. The other reason is because I realized that I really like the guitar work and I want to listen to the entire album.